How Did It Get So Bad?




Women are known to be blessed with so much aura and attraction. Women were known to be very decent and hard to get. Men used to go through a lot of stress just to have a woman and they enjoyed doing it because they felt it was worth it. But have you realised lately that men no longer spend time trying to get women? My uncle recently told me how they used to write so many love letters, receive insults, and sometimes get beaten just in their struggle to get a woman. Women were seen as priceless jewels. Those were the days when women had some element of shame in them.

But what is happening these days, women have suddenly become shameless and do I call it abnormal? Looking at the dating arena, it is no longer what it used to be. Men no longer bother so much about women because we have so much cheapened ourselves that they now see us as the cheapest product in the market. I don’t know if you have heard this, but when you ask a man why he is not ready to go through stress for a woman he claims to love, the only response you get is this; there are so many girls out there looking for men. Girls, this is where we have suddenly brought ourselves to. We have suddenly become cheaper than chewing gum in the market.

Why have we suddenly gone against nature and the Nigerian culture that say a man should be the one to find a woman? It is now the other way round. Women are now all over the place (I call them hunters) hunting for the precious souls of men. This is why we now see women constantly putting pressure on men for marriage. Having lots of male friends has given me the privilege to know so much about how they feel about us. A friend who is contesting in the forthcoming election told me how girls have been disturbing him just by seeing his number on his campaign poster. He has been getting calls from all over Nigeria from those hunters.

Another friend of mine told me how he called a wrong number to speak with his friend in the Law School. The call went to a woman who said she is a lecturer in Imo State University. My friend never had peace as the woman refused to let him be. It got so bad that he switched off his phone.

Girls now move about town in search of precious souls to destroy. They have now changed their style after they found men getting tired of their regular antics. Girls no longer appear desperate and we no longer see them in taxis going from one office to the other. They have suddenly stepped up to something bigger and more daring. You now see them in flights and corporate places.

Some of them have gone a step further by printing cards for businesses that don’t exist. They make sure they open up a good conversation line with you before they strike. These girls now dress so well and appear to belong to the working class. They know how to put you on their scale by getting all the necessary information about you. That will tell them if they should go on relating with you or just end it there. They have a very special way of finding out how loaded your pocket is.

Have you been to Transcorp Hilton lately? Girls now claim to get good jobs in Abuja. They announce their relocation to their friends and relations. Some of them even get a man to rent a place for them. On getting to Abuja, they use the money to take a room at the Hilton or a nearby hotel where politicians are known to visit. When you see these ones, they appear highly professional to the admiration of every man. Some of them even work with hotel staff who give them the room numbers of top political office holders and directors of different multinational companies. From their room, they put calls through to the targeted guests. One thing leads to another and you find them in the man’s room.

When we talk about men being promiscuous, I sometimes see it differently. Men, they say, are polygamous by nature. We all believe men are not so good when it comes to self control. But with the level that girls have taken this game to, it will take a man, a determined one, to survive it. It is no longer a matter of men having girlfriends outside their home, but it is now from one girl to the other. A man can now have seven girls at the same time if he so wishes. All it costs him is probably blackberry phones of N20k or lace wig of N20k. What a shame!

Girls now go the extent of telling lies with their mothers’ life just to get some cash from men. Their level of greed is something to worry about. It is surprising seeing girls who are jobless drive better cars, wear better clothes, and travel more often than the hard-working ones. I feel very sad when I see girls, whose parents cannot even feed well, hop from one country to the other and wear the best designer clothes (that is all they live for). All that matters to you is getting a beautiful phone and Brazilian hair even when you don’t earn a penny.

Have you ever sat down to think of the number of years you have wasted due to your insanity? You could be looking at yourself now as a very pretty girl. You are now the happening babe in town. Girl, give yourself few years and the beauty is gone. The only thing that can keep you standing and being admired in the nearest future is CHARACTER and HARDWORK. The beauty of any woman is character. Yes, you may end up getting married because of your looks, but there won’t be peace and you will still live a life of total emptiness.

Women were known to be the ones taking the eyes of our men off the streets into the house. But what do we have these days? Girls are now the ones finding out the good restaurants in town, they know all the club houses and latest bars in town. Women no longer desire to know how to cook and fix dinner for a man.

I just wish you can take just an hour out of your busy schedule of hoping around and clubbing, to think about your life and future. The best time to plan for the next twenty years is now. Don’t you know there is something in you that no other person has? Don’t you know that nature has blessed you with so much great potential that humanity should benefit from? Why waste your youth on frivolities? There is something you know how best to do, there is something you have strong passion for.

Any man who does not help you realise your dreams, any man who cannot help bring out the hidden potential in you, I don’t care how much he sings the love song to you, girl he does not love you. Love is not about giving millions to a woman (unfortunately that is what Nigerian ladies want). When a man loves you, he sees opportunities for you to become great and draws you into it without thinking twice. A man who loves you does not always give you fish; he shows you how to catch the fish yourself.

When you go about following those men and travelling all over the world with them, remember the clock is ticking, every minute, every second counts and you will never see them again. The man has his business running while he takes you round the globe wasting your time. I know of a girl, a very pretty girl who recently won a beauty pageant. With all her beauty, this girl is totally useless as all the married man does for her is to give her tickets to different countries, buy her the latest SUVs, keep her in a good house that is not hers. She is enjoying it now; I know so many young girls envy her. But I think she is making the greatest mistake of her life and by the time she will cry out in pain, it will be too late to make amends.

God created her a very beautiful girl. Do you think she is making good use of that gift of beauty? I don’t think so because there is a purpose for that beauty. Remember, beauty without brain is worse than ugliness. It is really painful that so many ladies live and walk through this life under the shadow of a man. You just live and die without contributing anything to humanity. You live just to drive the big cars, attend high society parties, travel round the world. There is more to life than all these things. The most fulfilled life is a life that gave back to humanity.

I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to pass through this world and be known as that beautiful woman or that rich woman. I want to be identified with a cause for humanity. I want to be known as someone who affected lives in her lifetime. I want to be admired for intelligence and hardwork, not for beauty.

I have to go now, keep a date with me next week. I am going to stir some things up in you.

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