Lists To Live By (2)

I would like to start by thanking the people that read and responded to my last week article. From the responses I got, I knew that there were one or two things some people didn’t agree with and other things that people agreed with which were of help to them.

So, I have decided to share some of the responses with you all.

1. Dear Stella,

“Don’t ask your single friends for marital advice.”

I beg to disagree with this, believing that it is not all your single friends that are not responsible.  There are some that are married like you are, but can never give sensible marital advice. I believe it depends on the kind of friends one keeps, for even if that friend is single but responsible, he or she will never want his/her friend’s home to break.

—Adeola

2. Dear Stella,

“Never interrupt while you are being flattered.”

“Be engaged at least six months before you get married.”

I am a great fan, I read your columns, follow most of the films you act, see your maturity in life and I am really impressed.

For the first rule, I think if you allow too much flattery, it gets into your head and you are majorly the information you hear. We all have this tendency to want to be proud and arrogant except in cases where the Holy Spirit makes us humble.

For the second rule, I don’t agree with you because I have read books where it is stated that engagement should be at least for six months after a relationship that has lasted for up to two years. Please, share your thoughts with me.

—Miller Matthew

3. Hi Stella,

I love your write ups; I, however, disagree with the following.

Love means holding your tongue and being willing to listen without offering advice. These view aren’t feasible in the true world as it portrays those exhibiting these characters as being insincere. Talking strengthens love and offering advice is a show of concern.

—Ola Adebari

4. At first glance, it looks nice but on deeper scrutiny, it doesn’t make sense giving your neighbours information on your itinerary when travelling, no, not in Naija, and what is this crap about letting children find their own way, the Bible says “train up a child in the way he should go,” not let the child find his own way. I am a Christian and I live by the word. If we all could just live our lives according to Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, this world will be a better place. So my own list to live by is:

•Mind your own business.

•Love your neighbour as you love yourself or do unto others what you want done to you.

•Trust and pray to God.

 —Emmanuel Utomi

5.  Your list is very refreshing and realistic. In fact, I agree with all of them except the first one which I feel is not complete. It should be;  it’s ok to fail but don’t remain at that point of failure. You are doing a great job, God will continue to strengthen you.

—Josephine Okolo

6. The book list is definitely very true. Most of the things I found on that list were the things my parents insisted we do while growing up and now those are what form my value system. For instance, letting someone else know your itinerary when you are away from the house, you have to drop address, phone numbers and names, helping others discover their dreams, not taking advice from people who have never walked your path as they don’t have experience to advise from, going beyond point of duty, facing your devil, laughing at yourself ,going the extra mile, giving people a second chance and all the other things on the list as you put it. Personally, most of the things on this list informed the person that I am today.

In my own opinion, I will say that this list should be simplified and summarised and handed over to kids, parents and guardians to go over all the time and if we keep at it, we might be able to save 20 or more or even all. It’s really a LIST TO LIVE BY.

Stella you are doing a great job digging out stuffs like this. Sometimes I’m really scared of the upcoming generation. Values and moral ethics have taken a back seat in our generation. I pray for kids who will have good morals and have the fear of God and true love for themselves and others and will be able to make God proud, and their generation proud too. God bless you and I’m proud of you.

—Glory

7.  Dear Stella.

Quite a long time. How are you and the family? I always enjoy you both on TV and the internet. May God continue to increase your wisdom.

First, I agree with all the tips listed in your topic, “List To Live By” except two of them which are Laugh at yourself and A man is known by the book he reads. How can one laugh at himself? Moreover I’m interested in this book and how and where can I get a copy.

—Biyi Fayemi

8. Hi my lovely lovely actress

I like to respond to this part: “Spend your life lifting people up, not putting people down.” These words are so powerful and if you take a close look at most people, they  spend most of their time putting other people down and believe me, it is very bad. I believe that in this world, we need each other even if we don’t like each other.

The person you undermine will be the one to help you when you are desperate and at that moment, people you love will not  be around. I love people black, white, blue, young, old, rich, poor, skilled and stupid. These people, at the end of the day, make a difference. Some people are selfish and hate the truth.

Thank you, Stella

—P Mill

I got so many responses but unfortunately I wouldn’t be able to publish everything.  Thanks once again to all those that sent in their responses.

Don’t forget, when you’ve read all these things, remember to back them up by reading your Bible.

Quote: No knowledge is wasted.