In Her Own Right: Eulogy To First Lady In The Centre Of Excellence

By Mac Durugbo

The saying that behind every successful man there is a woman reverberated on Wednesday, May 13, 2015, at the hallowed halls of the Eko Hotel and Suites, Victoria Island, as the world celebrated the First Lady of Lagos State, Dame Emmanuella Abimbola Fashola. The occasion was the public presentation of a book in her honour, In Her Own Right, written by Mrs. Gbemi Shasore, wife of former Attorney General of the State, Mr. Olasupo Shasore, SAN. Although it was a book launch, the setting and the presentation went beyond the ordinary to assume the character of an award night where those who had the opportunity publicly awarded the celebrant the well deserved accolade of an epitome of humility and sound character while those who did not have the opportunity to express it publicly simply acquiesced by applauding.

From the Guest speakers, ranging from Mrs. Bimbo Oloyede, who spoke on “Achieving Together”, through Pastor Ituah Ighodalo, who spoke on “Women In Their Own Right”, to the author herself, who took the distinguished audience through her life experience with the celebrant, the theme, was the same – Humility.

I shall crave the indulgence of the reader to repeat here some of what they said of the First Lady. In her presentation titled, “Achieving Together”, Mrs. Bimbo Oloyede, described the job of First Lady as tough because, according to her, “everybody is watching and waiting for you to make mistakes or get involved in one scandal or take an incorrect step or have a wrong expression on your face”. She put it this way, “If you dress well, they will say you are spending state’s money on fashion, if you dress poorly, they will wonder whether you don’t have any adviser”. But she said of the celebrant “The Lagos First Lady is an epitome of humility. I recommend her as a role model to all First Ladies. For any female public office holder to sail smoothly through her time in office, she should do well to emulate Dame Emmanuella Abimbola Fashola as a blue print for those coming after her.”

She was quick to explain, “The First lady is a woman who shows respect, very hospitable and she never imposes her opinion on others. She does not think that she does things as a favour to others. Above all, she demonstrates grace and passion for everything. Dame Emmanuella Abimbola Fashola has demonstrated certain enduring attributes which enable her to leave the stage while the ovation is loudest; she leaves State House with integrity, her efforts appreciated, her achievements applauded, her husband proud and her family intact.”

Pastor Ituah Ighodalo, another Guest Speaker, who spoke on “Women In Their Own Right”, noted that for a woman to be in her own right, she must have “Compassion, sympathy and kindness, be accessible, be willing to adapt, demonstrate love for people, be hard working, sincere, friendly and tolerant, attributes which, he observed, reside in the celebrant, who, aside possessing the ability to cope with pressure,  “has integrity, is generous, humble and has the spirit of excellence”.

Another Speaker, Mrs. Felicity Okokoh, representing Wellbeing Foundation in Africa, commended the author for putting together “the prolific literary work which gives the clips into the intricacies of public service roles that women have to play in a men-dominated society”.

The author, Mrs. Gbemi Shasore, said she was inspired by the comportment and excellence with which the First Lady approached her role and activities, adding that when she compared it with what she knew about similar people she met at the corridors of power in her younger days, she came out with the picture of an epitome of humility and integrity. Hear her, “Dame Abimbola Fashola has shown us that through friendship, women can overcome barriers confronting them in a male dominated society. What I saw in her made me to believe that when women work together, they make social change and we can see this in Lagos State.”

However, it is in the response of the First Lady that I wish to draw the theme of this piece. Aside her humble mane and the air of integrity that she exuded on the stage, the words that proceeded from her mouth were marble cast. They gave very deep insight into this woman of virtue. First, explaining why she never complained or showed any negative emotion any time she was at an occasion as a guest, even when things were not going as expected, the First Lady said any negative emotion would only increase the pressure on the host who must be under enormous pressure to please his or her guests and see that things go right. According to her, the host has honoured you by inviting you to the occasion and the only way you can show your appreciation is by encouraging her and not by increasing her anxiety.

The one that really got me, so to say, was when she spoke of letting other people shine as means of letting one’s own glory manifest. This is the way she put it; “It is only when you let others shine that your own glory will rise”.  Many generations ago, Jonathan Edwards, American Protestant Preacher, Philosopher and Theologian of the 19th Century, made much the same observation. He said: “Some persons are always ready to level those above them down to themselves while they are never willing to leverage those below them up to their own position. But he that is under the influence of true humility will  be willing that all should rise just so far as their diligence and worth of character entitle them to, and on the other hand, he will be willing that his superiors should be known and acknowledged in their place and have rendered to them all the honours that are their due”.

Saint Augustine of Hippo (Aurelius Augustinus Hipponesus 354 – 430 AD) Christian Theologian and Philosopher and Bishop of Hippo Regius (Modern day Annaba, Algeria) spoke in the same vein when he said: “Do you wish to rise? Begin by descending. You plan a tower that will pierce the clouds? Lay first the foundation of humility”.

In our world of the 21st century, unfortunately, the pull down and dominion syndrome constitute the predominant “virtues”. To this could, of course, be added marginalization. In the race to make it today in an economy that is shrinking by the day as a result of corruption and inept leadership, people are becoming more and more individualistic. To most, it is not because they want to be but because it is to them a survival strategy. But Dame Emmanuella Abimbola Fashola, by virtue of her position as the First Lady of the Centre of Excellence and State of Aquatic Splendour, refused to be carried away by the lure of Power. It wasn’t that she was superhuman.  She simply refused to be like “Them”. In our 16 years of democratic dispensation, we have seen many First Ladies. So what makes Dame Emmanuella Abimbola Fashola unique?  Attributing it to God, her mother and her husband among other influences, the First Lady advised women to instil good behaviour in their children through the carrot and stick approach. In other words, it was the age old method of parental upbringing that makes her unique.

Her husband, His Excellency the Governor of Lagos State, Mr. Babatunde Fashola SAN, of course did not leave anyone in doubt that his wife was the power behind his success. When it was his turn to deliver his address, he told the audience: “The First Lady is both friend and companion and in her role as both wife and First Lady not only made the home a place to return to after the day’s public outing but has also eased my burden by taking some roles away from me and performing them herself”. Such roles, according to the Governor, include the monthly Environmental Sanitation which she has been supervising in the last eight years, adding that it was a big relief for him as he was spared the burden of having to wake up early on Saturday morning.

That is where the popular saying,”Behind every successful man, there is a woman”, takes its relevance. His Excellency, Mr. Babatunde Fashola is today a role model, both nationally and internationally as a result of his transformational leadership and legacy of good governance. Today Nigerians know that Nigeria can work if only we have dedicated leaders. Dame Emmanuella Abimbola Fashola was the power behind the throne. She not only made the home a place to return to for her husband, but took some burdens away from him to ease his schedule. There is no hell that is worse than a home that is not in peace. Just imagine a nagging and complaining wife who would not let a poor Governor, who just went through hell trying to solve the numerous state problems, to rest in the house. He will definitely wake up on the wrong side of the bed the following morning and that could affect governance. The Governor himself captured the scenario in his speech. Describing his wife as both friend and companion, Governor Fashola said as a result of making the home a conducive place for him, the First Lady enabled him to wear a smile always and keep up appearance in public.  “I have learnt, for example, that whether I smile or not will determine whether some parts of Lagos will smile. So, I have learnt to smile because I have found out that some people, people that I am responsible for, feel happy because they see a smile on my face”, the Governor said adding, “Whether I am happy or not, of course, depends on what Abimbola did or did not do. So I thank her for making me have a happy home to go to at the end of the day”. That was how he put it.

So considering the height to which Governor Fashola has taken Lagos State today, what better evidence is there to prove that behind the success of Governor Babatunde Fashola, there is a Dame Emmanuella Abimbola Fashola working behind the scene. Congratulations Ma. Lagos and Nigeria, indeed Africa, owe you deep gratitude for the great strides and achievements which has made Lagos today a reference city for good governance and transformational leadership.

•Durugbo is Personal Assistant (Print Media) to the Governor of Lagos State